Saturday, October 29, 2011

questions.

we're not talking about the ability that people should have to be a leader, but we're talking about the responsibility that should be the key to every single person on earth who wants to be a leader. seriously, my country has always amazed me with all of those incredible people out there who think they could be a really good leader by making themselves richer. I was like, what would you do with all of those money you had? was it really what you need? was it really what you want to made yourself happy? and was it really made you feel happy by feeding yourself and your family with all of those dirty disgusting money and let so many people suffered to death?
oh come on, just let someone, or just let yourself ask you one important question about all these inappropriate life you've made (I do realize that the word inappropriate is not really the right word to explain what they've done, but I think even the youngest sister of mine knows exactly what the word inappropriate means), don't you feel guilty of what you've done?

aneh

aku sedang berada di titik dimana aku hanya ingin diam dan membayangkan apa yang akan terjadi nanti, di kemudian hari, di suatu waktu, yang aku sendiri tak tau kapan waktu itu, dan apa harapanku. aneh memang, seperti melihat banyaknya manusia yang memperebutkan sesuatu yang sudah tidak lagi menjadi miliknya, namun masih belum rela untuk melepaskan hal itu begitu saja, yang aku yakin, mereka juga tidak yakin apa alasannya. ya, sama anehnya.
tidak perlu pergi untuk percaya, tidak perlu bukti untuk yakin, dan tidak perlu maaf untuk bertahan. karena semua itu terlalu fana, mata ini tidak selalu melihat yang sebenarnya, telinga ini tidak selalu mendengar realita, dan hati ini tidak selalu merasa yang sesungguhnya. jadi cukup bayangkanlah, sehingga kita tidak perlu menjadi bodoh untuk terus menerka, karena semua hanyalah bayangan yang ada di pikiran.
yahh.. paling tidak kekuatan pikiran terbukti selalu lebih baik dibanding kekuatan hati.

Friday, October 28, 2011

sick!

aku tidak sedang berbicara tentang bagaimana kayanya negeriku, yang rakyatnya banyak yang mati karena kekurangan gizi. aku tidak sedang berbicara tentang bagaimana hebatnya para pemimpinku, yang semakin hari semakin pintar menanam kekayaannya sendiri. aku juga tidak sedang berbicara tentang bagaimana pintarnya orang-orang penting itu, yang terus membiarkan daftar panjang angka buta huruf di negerinya sendiri.
tapi aku sedang berbicara tentang betapa muaknya diriku melihat orang-orang yang mengaku penting itu, mengeruk segala keuntungan bangsa ini untuk dirinya sendiri. aku sedang berbicara betapa banyaknya orang-orang yang dirugikan dan mati sia-sia karena ulah tolol para pemimpinnya yang selalu merasa mereka yang paling pintar. dan aku sedang berbicara mengenai betapa muaknya aku untuk terus berada di dalam negeri para penipu dan pencuri harta rakyatnya sendiri.

Friday, October 14, 2011

doubt.

"Doubt can be a bond as powerful and sustaining as certainty. Even if you feel certainty, it is an emotion not a fact."
its not about dealing with the reality that probably doesn't want you to be here, or dealing with the fact that you shouldn't have to be here.
maybe you should really have to stop talking, cause it confused me even more. are you talking about the real thing, or you're just goofing around trying to make some jokes?
I used to be so sure almost about e-ve-ry-thing, but now, about this one, I use to say.. yes, maybe I started to feel doubt.
so.. fine, I'll stop talking and find the fact in reality.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

religion

"what is your religion?"
my mother told me that it's inappropriate to ask people about their religion, I didn't believe it at first, but now I know that it was a billion percent correct.

buat gw, agama, kepercayaan, dan apapun yang berhubungan antara manusia dengan Tuhannya itu adalah masalah pribadi, it's absolutely privacy. apapun yang berbau SARA, itu nggak seharusnya jadi konsumsi publik, atau jadi urusan publik. why? because it's sensitive, and it's none of your business. karena saling menghormati itu sangat, sangat berbeda dengan ikut campur. honestly, I hate to talk about religion, just mind your own business, and stop bothering people about what they should do to their God, it has nothing to do with you (who called yourself the hand of God).
I do feel so ashamed of my country to let those kinda people and group ever exist.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

imperfection

"there is no such thing as imperfection, everybody is perfect, it only depends on how we see it."


ask yourself, why do you want to be perfect? then look around, and ask what perfect is?
life lessons are everywhere around, you don't even have to be so sensitive to realize.

hari ini kebagian jadwal jaga museum, karena Taman Budaya lagi rame karena ada acara pertunjukan dan lomba dari anak-anak SLB dari seluruh Indonesia. awalnya sih gw kira ngga ada yang special, karena gw kira anak-anak SLBnya cuma nonton doang, tapi ternyata mereka yang pentas, mereka yang orang bilang tidak sempurna itu mulai ngelakuin suatu bentuk kegiatan yang biasa orang normal lakuin. mungkin ini akan kedengeran bodoh, tapi gw bener-bener baru tau kalo SLB itu nggak cuma buat anak-anak keterbelakangan mental aja, tapi juga buat mereka yang diffable (diffable mulai digunain untuk menyebut anak-anak dengan kebutuhan khusus, karena dirasa tidak sopan untuk menyebut mereka cacat). mostly mereka nari dan main alat musik tradisional gitu, mereka didandanin total (ya persis kaya orang mau pentas). yes, they did nothing to me. but it's not about doing nothing or something, it is about dealing with my thought about being perfect. cause now I do realize that every person has a right to be a person, a perfect human being, and everybody should respect that. dulu banget, gw takut dengan keberadaan mereka, karena gw pikir mereka akan ganggu gw dan membuat keadaan jadi ngga nyaman. tapi cuma dari ngeliat kejadian tadi sebentar aja, then I know I was a jerk! they don't deserve a person like me. cause that kind of judgement is so not fair for them, they never wanted to be one, everybody wants to be perfect and so do they.
and another amazing thing about them is >> selama gw jadi guide di Museum Anak Kolong Tangga, jelasin ke anak-anak segala macem umur, sampe jelasin ke orang asing, dari mulai pake bahasa Indonesia, Jawa abal-abal, bahasa Inggris, sampe pake bahasa anak-anak yang gw ngga tau apa artinya.. baru tadi gw liat pengunjung museum paling semangat dengan tingkat keingin tahuan yang sangat tinggi, iya sangat tinggi. and you know what? they can't speak, they also can barely hear your voice, you have to scream first to notice them that you're around, yes they're deaf. tapi gw sangat bisa liat kalo mereka sangat seneng dan semangat untuk liat-liat semua koleksi yang ada di museum, dibaca satu-satu, lari-lari kalo liat mainan yang disuka. it may sounds simple for other people, but it really meant something to me. you know why? just don't judge people from the outside, cause you can barely see anything from there, judge them from being who they are, and what's in it.

stop making a joke about them, it's not funny at all.
everybody deserves to be perfect, and so do they.