Thanksgiving 2022: three and a half year later
I am in North Carolina again right now. Spent my second Thanksgiving two days ago, with a house full of laughter, a family full of love, and a heart full of gratitude. It feels like I have never been this calm and happy in such a really really long time that I can feel a stream of gratitude flows through my heart. I think I wrote it here that I had another serious relapse last May, the three-year anniversary. It was tough, my head was heavy and dark. I thought I wouldn't recover. I always wondered how long life has to stay that way. I still had no desire to think about the future, like it even matters. I was so skeptical about life and taking life too seriously is just dumb. I had everything I'd ever wanted, all the love in the world, yet no matter how sunny the day is outside, inside, it'd always been a dark cloud. That was pretty much how my days were six months ago. It is kind of interesting to remember that I thought I was no longer floating back then, but looking at it...