Saturday

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The heart races, dark clouds, empty head, your smile, the birds sing, and my eyes on your steps. What are we doing here? You have to tell me what we are going to do when the week ends!

Yesterday my head was spinning. I needed good company, I held back my tears losing one of the many nonsense battles I had with myself. You said I worry too much. Yeah, maybe, you're right, I guess now fear is stronger than doubt. But what do I fear? I don't know... failure, lies, truth, exclusion, hatred, love? They all can't be far from myself. I know you think I'm losing my mind but it's so hard not to feel disgusted by this girl you met last night. How can people love me is the question I share aloud. But fuck it, you were there and you smell amazing, there's nothing I could complain about. Nobody knows who you are in my life, but I guess I just have to celebrate what is that makes me happy - and think about why is only when I'm in agony.

I could spend day and night writing poetry in awe of your beauty.

While you could just sit there, drinking more wine, talking to me.

To be that poetry, to keep the soul hungry.

As odd as I am to you, and the world, to misery.

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